This week, the four outbackers will attempt to convene for the first ever (second attempted) Outback Bowl Weekend in Chicago. For those less in the know, The Outback Bowl (OBB) used to be solely about maximizing the demoralization of the loser, with no reward for first place. After the season was over, we would collectively decide when and where was best to convene together to celebrate, which was most often somewhere in NC over the Christmas/New Year's period, and have a nice, relaxing, civil dinner with reasonable portions and the occasional splurge for a Diet Coke. We've since evolved ever so slightly, where the winner gets to pick the location of an NFL game for which we shall all gather to enjoy the spoils of victory (while still maximizing the demoralization of the loser, of course; that part inevitably remains).

Last year, Bryant picked Tampa Bay. An apropos choice, Tampa is the home to the original Outback Steakhouse and their corporate headquarters. As such, there is an Outback a mere 7 minutes from Raymond James Stadium. Unfortunately, the plan was thwarted by a one-two punch of COVID and an interesting decision to fly Spirit Airlines out of the burgeoning metropolis that is Concord, NC.

With Randy's unprecedented victory this past year and his newfound feeling of what it's like to not lose, we head to Chicago to watch the 'Thers battle it out with the Bears in a battle of who really got got in the infamous 2023 trade. This decision led to an interesting discovery - there are no Outback Steakhouses within 30 minutes of Soldier Field. In fact, as I'm looking now at what is 3:45 central time on a Tuesday, it's nearly 45 minutes away.

Wanting to aid future winners (i.e., me) and understand the Outback landscape across potential Outback Bowl Weekend geographies, yours truly undertook the intense secondary research required to identify the closest Outback Steakhouse to every NFL stadium in the US. Heavy is the head, they say.

Here are the results:

High Level Takeaways:

• Excluding Green Bay, for which the closest is outside of Milwaukee's airport two hours south, the average NFL stadium is just 15 minutes away from an Outback
• Outback Steakhouse's corporate (and potential real-estate) strategy is clearly to target suburbia, with stadiums existing outside of downtown residing closest to an Outback (e.g., Buffalo Bills, Washington Commanders, MetLife Stadium) and those in downtown areas needing to get an uber copter to get to your steak due to a combination of traffic and distance (e.g., Chicago Bears, So-Fi Stadium, Philly, Atlanta).
• Many downtown stadiums will have several Outbacks encircling them at nearly the same radii, giving Outbackers several options of equally inconvenient distances to choose from (see Cincinnati as a prime example below, where the purple dot is Paycor Stadium).

Interesting Locations:

• The notable exception to the above and probably the highest real-estate value Outback location in the US is on the Las Vegas strip, just over a mile away from Allegiant stadium next to Harrah's.
• Highmark Stadium is surprisingly close to an Outback, as it is located in a unique combination of farmland and strip-malls (an Outbacker's natural habitat).
• The Outback in Chicago, of which we will be patrons, is currently the highest Google rated Outback location in the United States at an impressive 4.9 stars. While I cannot confirm it's the newest, it just opened in June of this year.
• Baltimore has an urban Outback located in a Canton neighborhood office building near the water. Though it's one of the closest by mileage, the traffic holds it back in overall proximity rank.

Final Thoughts: May future winners look back fondly upon the research conducted here today to make their decisions. May the odds ever be in my favor, alone.

-GG

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